Stop People-Pleasing In Your Content
“R u mad at me” is what I wanted to ask you after the newsletter I sent last week about AI, but I held back because:
- You’re not my boyfriend, so obviously I’m not gonna subject you to that (like I do to him probably 27 times a week 😆).
- It actually doesn’t matter, because I’m not going to conform my business to anyone’s beliefs other than my own.
Maybe that makes me sound like a major b*tch, but I promise I’m not trying to be.
In my offline life, I’m actually probably one of the most nonconfrontational people you’ll ever meet. It bothers me a LOT to think that maybe I’ve hurt someone’s feelings, or alienated them, or worse – angered them. 😬
But the reality of putting yourself out there online as a business owner (especially when that business exists almost entirely behind a screen) is that people aren’t always gonna agree with you.
Sometimes, the things you post will be received negatively. People will unfollow. Unsubscribe.
Part of that is because there’s very little room for nuance online. But sometimes people just openly disagree with you, and that’s okay.
If you’re a people-pleaser like I am, this can be really hard to accept. It hurts and leaves you feeling strangely vulnerable.
But I really want to challenge you to push through these feelings.
Part of stepping into your voice online and becoming known as an “authority” is being willing to be disagreed with.
Not on purpose or to because you’re trying to get a reaction – but when you’re sharing your perspectives and fully embodying your beliefs, there are GOING to be people who don’t share those ways of thinking.
It’s inevitable.
It can be tempting to hold back or “tame down” the stuff you want to say in hopes you’ll be able to keep everyone happy and make sure everyone loves you. But think about some of the memorable business owners you follow – are they really out here dishing out lukewarm takes and saying the same things as everyone else?
NO. I know they’re not, because they wouldn’t be memorable to you if that were the case.
You can’t water down every take you have to appease everyone.
All that’s gonna do is ensure you’re not resonating or memorable to ANYONE.
I want you to be confident in your own voice and perspective, and part of that comes with time. The more you show up online, the more you create, the more content you publish – the more that confidence grows (I can attest to that personally).
But part of that also comes from learning how to sit in the discomfort of it. Knowing that if you truly believe in what you’re creating, and you’ve got the experience/perspective/insight to back you up, and you’re being true to you, it doesn’t matter if you ruffle someone’s feathers a bit.
You haven’t done anything wrong.
I’d argue you’re actually doing something right, because you’re setting yourself up to only attract super-aligned people into your audience. Rather than attracting just *anyone* who needs what you offer.
Repelling people who disagree with us is actually a GOOD thing.
Because those people were never actually going to work with us anyway. Or if they do, it’s probably not going to be a super fun experience for either of you. In my experience, this is how a lot of those nightmare-client-scenarios begin.
You want to work with the people who read your words and feel seen. Who resonate with what you’re saying 9 times out of 10. Who consume your content and think, “finally, someone said it,” then keep coming back for more.
Those are the people you’re building your business to serve.